I read Nabeel Qureshi’s book “Seeking Allah and Finding Jesus”…..and it made me so angry!
Mind you, I was happy for him and happy that he chose to give his life to Christ, but I was angry at the “truth” he revealed in that book. I quote the truth because I don’t know it as THE TRUTH yet, but I know it for his own truth. It will actually be quite easy to confirm if there’s any truth to what he said, I only have to read up on the information he provided or do a personal research on my own, which I don’t think am ready to do. What if he’s telling the truth? What if? It’s so damn scary.
The thing is, he wasn’t trying to paint the other side bad but revealing them for who and what they actually are according to history and their book.
But it wasn’t an easy thing to read for me. You see, I come from a Muslim family but I chose to convert along the way because I never felt the religion belonged to me, I didn’t feel like Allah was my God and I felt I had to work for his love, but the more I tried the lonelier it felt and the farther he seemed, and so I converted(which isn’t why we are here).
Now, I’m not saying He isn’t all these for people, I’m just saying it wasn’t the same for me. I’ve always respected the religion and those that practice it, I have nothing but love for them. I mean, c’mon I have them as family and friends so it is really no big issue.
And then, I read this book, it gave me a mixed feeling, on one hand I am happy someone from another religion publicly came out to accept Jesus as his personal Lord and Savior, then went as far as writing a book about it (reading it I’ve never felt more proud of my faith), and on the other hand I am blatantly angry!
Angry at the deception, the long yearssssssss of lies and blindness that have been passed from one generation to the next about a religion that is now looking to be false. I’m also angry at Nabeel (it’s crazy I know, he didn’t do anything), but my anger still remain because if I go by what he published that means my educated family and friends (nah, I need to lay emphasis on that). My EDUCATED family and friends are been lied to, because I refuse to believe they read the Quran and Hadith for themselves, saw everything written in plain colors and then chose to stay and believe in the religion.
Of a truth, there’s safety in ignorance, Nabeel could have chosen that the same way his parents did, he could have chosen to continue in ignorance instead of being ostracized from his loved ones. Now, I’m torn between choosing ignorance for myself, and it’s a lot funny because this isn’t about me, it doesn’t affect me directly, this is not my religion but I still feel cheated and lied to on behalf of my friends and family.
And just like that, I’m back to being angry. Do I choose to know for myself with a possibility of a future anger if there’s a truth to this, or accept the knowledge of one man’s truth and fight off my anger?…….
This is just me rambling on about a book I read that didn’t sit well with me, this is me in my emotions. I’m sorry if my rants comes off as insulting , it wasn’t intended. If you’ve read this book please leave a comment I would love to hear your opinion…..