I kinda disagree with you here. Maybe it's her choice of words that makes you think she's not thinking for herself.
To me, she's already in a union where she has to consider her partner, so her choosing to go with her husband is a right move.
Is she to disrespect both men and say "oh, you people should have a rumble at each other's throats cos none of you is going to tell me what to do" and then walk out?